In 2005, I was a 25 year old and energetic graduate student. I was excited about completing the graduate program in Sociology, after spending years thinking about and exploring ways to create equitable spaces for a disadvantaged populations. I had begun my college education thinking that I want it to be a civil rights or immigration attorney, but decided that I wanted to be a social worker, and then a Clinical Psychologist, and finally a Sociologist. Very early on, I wanted to work within the helping professions and considered myself an ally, even as I did not have the language to express it.
As I completed the program in Sociology, I had a conversation with one of my professor mentors. I told that him my plans for post graduate school, which included traveling to Brazil and to Haiti, with the goal of creating programs for women. Having read about the rate of HIV in poor communities in those spaces, knowing (theoretically) about the demographic transition, and that access to education improves reproductive health, I was sure that I knew what women needed. I had never been to Brazil, nor Haiti for that matter, but in my mind, I was an expert at creating social change because, after all, I’d read everything about social change and Brazil and Haiti that I could get my hands on. I was excited as I shared that vision with my professor mentor. He listened patiently. As I finished, he took a deep breath, and thoughtfully began, “We have to be careful assuming that we know more. Our job as Sociologists is not to pretend or presume to know more about the lived experiences of a people or person. There is likely nothing that you think you know about these women’s lives that they don’t know intimately. There are probably no programs that you can think of that they have not already considered or tried. The issue isn’t always a lack of knowledge. Often, the issue could be a lack of resources.” That was by far, one of the most impactful conversations I’d had in the program. In essence, my professor was telling me to, “check my privilege,” and all of the assumptions that came with it. That conversation, although close to 15 years ago, still resonates with me daily.
I did not leave the country as soon as graduate school ended. I married a month after graduation and my plans of heroically saving the world was put on hold. I did, however, soon take a job as a foster care case manager. In my first week, I was a bright and energetic new case manager, ready, once again, to go out and heroically save the world. I was convinced that children placed in foster homes would fare better than remaining in homes where they experienced neglect and/or abuse, and I was sure that these children would be happier. In a one on one with my supervisor, I recall him giving a gentle reminder, “no matter what mothers do, kids love their moms and will often try to get back to them. Don’t assume that foster care is what is best for children. Some placements aren’t great placements and some instances of neglect are related to a lack of resources. Don’t assume you know better.” Again, a “check your privilege” conversation. I didn’t know better nor more about the lives of the clients. I knew very little at the time of how to effect social change, neither on a micro or macro level.
Ten years later, I began my own small business providing Diversity, Inclusion, Equity and Justice training for educators, corporations, and other entities. Often, the participants in my training are well meaning and consider themselves to be allies. Often, participants identify as politically liberal or progressive, and have strong desires to engage in social change. I tell both of the preceding personal stories as I train to encourage participants to consider what it means to be an ally in a holistic way. I encourage participants to consider the idea that allyship does not mean that we know better; instead allyship requires that we ask how can I support, and sometimes allyship requires that we are silent. Allyship occurs on a continuum or a spectrum and is highly dependent upon the need and the aims of the group experiencing marginalization and disadvantage.
Central to my work and these conversations, particularly with self-identified allies and social change agents is the idea that it is vital to intentionally not shame allies as they are on their journeys. Because allyship is a spectrum of possibilities, it is plausible that some may use a version of allyship that may not be the most effective in certain situations, even as they are well intentioned. If they are indeed an ally, redirection, questions, and reminders are useful in assisting in their growth. If they are well intentioned allies, they are by themselves seeking out opportunities themselves to move toward an understanding of allyship as a continuum and not a destination. As a caveat, of course, it is also true that there are some who call themselves allies who, in a word, aren’t. There are some who identify themselves as allies of one group while maintaining and defending systems of oppression for other groups. These are not the people of whom I am concerned with. I am, however, concerned with allies who do not always see the continuum of allyship, but who are actively seeking to dismantle systems of oppression.
However, as I think about power relationships and dynamics, even the language of allyship does not fully capture the role that we could play in assisting in creating equitable spaces. One current phenomenon that has led me to consider the language of allyship recently has been the news of the numerous black trans women who were killed during PRIDE month 2019. There is no way that I can know the incredible amount of inequity used experienced by black trans women. While I know to some extent the way inequities work related to race and gender, it would be misleading to presume to know the everyday lived experiences of members within the trans community. Truly, I am hesitant to even say that I can advocate on the behalf of the trans community in a way that brings a meaningful change. While it is true that as someone who identifies as cisgender, I have a responsibility to do something with my privilege, but part of that means supporting members of marginalized groups and without centering myself as an ally.
In an effort to expand our understanding of allyship as well decenter the ally, I would suggest that the following Continuum of Allyship:
Questions we can ask/answer as we attempt to move toward a more full understanding of Allyship:
1. How do we understand our own power in relationships?
2. What does it mean to be an ally?
3. Does allyship operate differently depending on the time, the place, circumstance? (population served, etc?)
4. What options do we have within allyship?
5. How do we choose how to be an ally in any situation?
Allyship is:
Definition - An active and consistent practice of unlearning and re-evaluating. As an ally, a person with privilege seeks to operate in solidarity with a marginalized group.
In working with marginalized groups, however, the work must support and be recognized as supportive by the marginalized group.
Key to allyship is intentionality. Allies along the continuum provide a space and potentially a voice for disadvantaged groups, often while maintaining their distinct position of power.
Relationship to Power - Allyship sometimes implies a power dynamic that removes agency from the hands of the already marginalized group. Allyship is sometimes limiting, as it does not often require “placing oneself in the shoes of”; it does instead assume power and control for the group that does not experience that form of marginalization.
Advocacy is:
Definition - speaking on the behalf of the marginalized group. It is an organized effort to garner public political, social and/or economic support on behalf of a marginalized group or entity. The goal tends to be engagement and collective action.
Key to advocacy – Listening to the marginalized group, being able to synthesize needs and demands, and accurately report those demands to powerful stakeholders and decision makers.
Relationship to power – Advocacy also implies that the advocate has power. Distinctions are made between the advocate and members of the marginalized. These distinctions might be useful in gaining access to power-holders. However, actions are driven by those with power, and requires that power-holders report and demand in the interest of the marginalized group with no bias or ulterior motive.
Accomplices are:
Definition - listening to the words, needs, ideas of marginalized groups and supporting their efforts toward freedom and liberation.
Key to being an accomplice – Accomplices support the efforts of marginalized groups without demanding centering and power. Accomplices have agency but have no desire to be centered nor direct conversations or actions. The key to being an accomplice is the willingness to listen to understand rather than to respond. Accomplices validate experiences of marginalized groups even as they may also experience marginalization.
Relationship to power – Accomplices follow the lead of those who experience marginalization. Accomplices support the efforts of and remains present for goals of liberation and transformation of systems. Accomplices recognize their inability to speak for or on behalf of, but stands in solidarity with marginalized groups.
Activists are:
Definition – Kendi (2019: 209), defines activism as someone who “produces power and policy change, not mental change. If a person has no record of power or policy change, then that person is not an activist.”
Key to being an accomplice – Activists use their position of power to both listen to those who experience marginalization and to create change within the systems that oppress them. Activists do not assume to know better; but instead rely on members of the marginalized groups and accomplices to drive systemic change. Additionally, activists may also be members of the group that experiences marginalization BUT is within a position of power to drive change in policy. Activists recognize their agency and power, even as they may experience marginalization and oppression.
Relationship to power – Activists follow the lead of those who experience marginalization, or they experience marginalization and oppression themselves. Activists demand liberation and transformation of systems through changing policy and systems. Activists recognize their agency and power and use it in a macro level way.
One of the benefits of considering the variety of ways that one may engage in allyship is that it frees would be allies up to experience growth. By asking the right questions and developing a language and typology that allows for accountability, we can move toward a greater understanding allyship, transformation of individuals and systems, and liberation and freedom. This is, of course, in no way an attempt to suggest that all are interested in liberation and freedom. It is instead to posit that people who see themselves as allies and progressives may not always engage in a manner that is respectful or responsive to the goals of marginalized groups. Developing a common language and understanding may allow those allies to be critical of their own (our own) actions and motivations in creating change, the avenues through which we create that change, as well as our relationships with groups that experience marginalization.
I admit, I myself have not arrived. One of my goals in writing this is to remind myself that allyship is not one size fits all situations, groups, circumstances, but instead it IS a continuum. My hope is that this resonates with others as well. The work toward equity and justice is a constant work. In the words of Angela Y. Davis, "freedom is a constant struggle." So too is the work of building a more equitable and just society.